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The Adventures of Chef Boehly (Episode 1)

The events of the 24th of April, 2012, would hardly leave the memory of most Chelsea fans.

It was a season that looked like a completely lost cause after the 3-1 defeat to a rampaging Napoli side led by Cavani in Naples. Having confined the ghosts of the AVB era to history, Chelsea miraculously turned the tide around at Stamford Bridge to send Walter Mazzarri’s men crashing out of the UEFA Champions League.

Standing right between Chelsea and a final berth was Pep Guardiola’s very well-drilled Barcelona side, who did not take too long to assert their influence. Sergio Busquets and Iniesta had Chelsea two goals down, and a strange foul on Alexis Sanchez had seen John Terry sent in for an early bath. However, in the 46th minute, Ramires pulled off some Brazillian magic from a glorious Frank Lampard through-ball that cut through Barca’s defence like a hot knife through butter to reduce the deficit.

The ten men of Chelsea held on and what followed in the 92nd minute was a brilliant goal from a counterattack which led to Gary Neville, on commentary duties coming down with ‘eargasm.’ [Don’t be lazy, you should find out what that word means if it’s new to you Hahahaha].

Photo Credit: Jasper Juinen/Getty Images

So what is the connection between Todd Boehly’s adventures in the kitchen and Chelsea’s iconic night at the Camp Nou?

Football is a game of thrills and drama, but it could be decided by the finest of margins in many cases, and it takes great players to create all these iconic moments.

Suppose the promise of a thrilling experience by Chelsea’s new owners is true; the summer transfer window of 2022 is crucial in preparation for the first entire season post-Abramovich era.

Having announced the captures of Raheem Sterling from Manchester City and Napoli’s Senegalese skipper, Kalidou Koulibaly, Chelsea’s summer transfer business has not been short of drama. Moving in daredevil fashion, it looked like Chelsea had hijacked the deal for Raphinha under the noses of Arsenal, only for it to be hijacked by a supposedly cash-strapped FC Barcelona. The “Jules Kounde Show” followed in a similar style, only for the French Centre-back to be unveiled as one of the Catalonian club’s latest recruits.

So far, it has looked like a scattergun approach that has not been helped by high-profile departures from the Chelsea hierarchy, most notably Marina Granovskaia, regarded as the most powerful woman in football. Marina had built up a reputation as a tough negotiator, but while this may have worked in Chelsea’s favour, she did not have the best scouting team behind her. Quite a lot of people are swift to blame her for the poor signings forgetting that her job was not to scout players but to negotiate with the selling club. The vacuum created by these high-profile departures may have slowed down the process, but it could be a blessing in disguise.

You can argue that Roman’s money had covered a lot of mess at Stamford Bridge. The current Chelsea squad is loaded with Class-C and D eggs struggling to attract any interest with Danny Drinkwater, who joined for £35m, eventually leaving the club on a free transfer after racking up less than 35 appearances in his 5-years stint at the club.

Apart from strengthening the current squad, the new management team must also wash the last administration’s dirty dishes. They kicked on a ruthless note with the decision to send big-name flop Romelu Lukaku back to Inter Milan on loan. This is very daring when considering the staggering financials behind the Belgian’s move to Chelsea. Lukaku signed a deal with Chelsea till 2026, and the amortization left on the payment of his transfer fees stands at £78m and an annual wage of £16.9m. Inter Milan will be responsible for his wages for the duration of his loan deal, leaving Chelsea’s books with the remainder of his wages for three years and the amortized transfer fee totaling a whopping £128.7m of lousy business on a single player.

Photo Credit: https://www.footballtransfers.com/en/transfer-news/it-serie-a/2022/06/he-betrayed-us-why-romelu-lukaku-is-not-welcome-back-inter

Let’s review the estimated costs of some of the less-expensive players to understand why Chelsea desperately needs some structure and, most importantly, an experienced Director of Football to plug the waste pipe that has long been open at Chelsea.

All wages stated here are estimated as gathered from spotrac.com.

Name Amortization left Salary (per Annum) Duration left Total
Baba Rahman £1m £4.5m 2 £10m
Bakayoko £3.6m £5.7m 2 £15m
Batshuayi £1.5m £4.68m 1 £6.18m
Emerson £2.4m £3.9m 2 £10.2m
Miazga £200,000 £800,000 1 £1m
Barkley £5m £5m 1 £10m
Kenedy £900,000 £1.3m 1 £2.2m
Kepa £30m £7.8m 3 £53.4m
Sarr £0 £6.2m 3 £18.6m
Loftus-Cheek £0 £3.1m 2 £6.2m
Ziyech £21.6m £5.2m 3 £37.2m
Werner £28.6m £14.1m 3 £70.9m

 

These figures amount to approximately £240m, rising to £368m, including the statistics from Lukaku, which the club could be looking to move off their books soon. Chelsea could have avoided these liabilities if they had a good scouting team and a good football brain coordinating transfers. Hence, amidst all Boehly’s acquisitions this summer, recruiting a Director of Football is a vital ingredient that needs to be prioritized, and he must clean up the scouting department.

This Post Has 3 Comments

  1. Heney Umoru

    Weldon prof. Thanks for bringing is closer to Todd

  2. Sodiq Suara

    Chef Todd have a lot of work to do going by this writeup, I hope he get it right

  3. Joseph Okiche

    A lot of deadwood players need to leave Chelsea.

    Chelsea can’t continue to spend over €250million every summer hence having a data-driven scouting department is non-negotiable.

    Thanks, Prof.

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